I think I won the penis lottery.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Randomize
