NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize
