why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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