i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
