i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Houston, we have a blender
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize