I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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