My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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