if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Randomize
