He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
