i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
