Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
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