I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
