no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Randomize
