feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
