I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
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