Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
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