thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
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