I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
