I just made out with a guy for $7.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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