rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
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