He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
She's the barista slut.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Randomize
