ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Randomize