wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
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