Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Found your dick twin last night
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
