i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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