if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
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