So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
You can't special order awesome
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
The adults are the big ones right?
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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