i just made my gag reflex go away.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
I'm both gender and math confused
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
