I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Randomize
