just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
