How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
