i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
lets start a swedish sibling band together
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Randomize
