You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize