I think im going to throw up on grandma
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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