We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Randomize
