he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize