If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
i now understand why vodka
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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