I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
