nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
