what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
