How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
