She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
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