yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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