i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
