You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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