gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Even my vagina gasped.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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