if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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