Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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