hotel room ftw
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
