I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
That accounts for only three of the penises
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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