there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Randomize