About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize