i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Randomize
