Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
